Music lives in me. I am always seeking out a “musical moment,” that feeling you get when you hear a song that reflects exactly how you’re feeling, says what you want to say, and just clicks. Finding those moments helps me connect with the music. Sharing those moments helps me connect with others. Embracing those moments helps me connect with myself.
It’s my first blog week! Time to dig deep into the musical archives…
“Castle on the Hill”
by Ed Sheeran
It’s Monday. This semester I’m typically home on Mondays, so my mental space vacillates between being focused, productive and even-keel to feeling anxious, antsy and all over the place. Today, ironically, I am feeling a mixture of all of those things. Anxious and antsy, yet driven to be productive and motivated to continue striving for happiness.
For the last several days I have been craving independence; living at home in your late 20’s can do that to a girl. More and more lately I have been daydreaming (yes, literally) of being on my own, having total control and being responsible for myself without having any parental entities in my peripheral vision, or looming over me, which is how it feels some days. “Castle on the Hill” embodies the sense of adventure that’s been rushing through me, the feeling of starting something new and embracing new experiences.
Ed Sheeran does a lot of reflecting on his own life and the people, places, and stories that have brought him to where he is now. Listening to it reminds me of how far I’ve come and encourages me to keep going, that no matter how anxious or stuck I might feel, I have the power and the ability to keep moving forward. It helps to put the anxieties to rest for a while, allowing me to work hard and continue to appreciate the journey I’m on.
Lana Del Ray
I was exhausted this morning after having a really rough night’s sleep. I had just downloaded “Love” on Monday night (possibly what aided in my lack of ability to sleep, those technology waves taking over my brain and all), and was excited to shuffle through all of my new music. This song came on and right away it felt like a lullaby. Was it wise to listen to a lullaby when I was tired, driving, and about to start a 10 hour day at my internship? Probably not. But it was what I needed.
I remembered a conversation I once had with a supervisor about what to do on days when your energy is low, when you’re tired or drained but still have to get work done and see clients. Her response, recognize and acknowledge where you’re at.
You’re not always going to be full of energy every day, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be effective when working with others. Being honest about your physical and emotional state each day will help you understand what you’re capable of, and help others understand it as well, making you relatable, and frankly, human. I listened to the song again on the way home and still enjoyed its soothing quality, which late in the day was a perfect way to wind down.
I was in quite the sentimental mood today and when “Unconditionally” first came on, it made me very emotional. I had to turn it off before it finished, but then stopped to reconsider the lyrics for a moment. They speak about how tough it can be getting close to someone, bringing up insecurities and allowing people to see you, flaws and all. It also offers the reassurance of unconditional love regardless of fears a person may have about opening up.
I am always receptive to people opening up to me—my boyfriend, friends, family members, and clients in an art therapy setting. In comfortable situations, I am usually able to open up to others pretty easily, too. But sometimes the insecurities and fear of judgment that follow are overwhelming.
I am not always able to understand that I can be the recipient of unconditional love as well as the provider and that not everything I say or do has to be perfect for it to be okay. I’m using this song as a reminder that maybe I should go a little easier on myself in this regard, and that there are in fact people in my life who will love me unconditionally.
“Is Your Love Big Enough?”
Lianne La Havas
I love this song. I love Lianne La Havas’s voice—sultry, sweet, smooth and sassy, which means it’s pretty easy for me to connect with her no matter what kind of day I’m having. I have no idea what the lyrics mean, but the tempo and vibe were all I needed.
I’ve been recognizing a noticeable lightness in my mood on Thursdays, likely because for this semester it’s the last day before my weekend starts. This song totally fits that mood. I sort of casually listened to it on the morning, but it wound up unintentionally resurfacing later in the day with a piece of art that I was making. I jammed to it in my head for the rest of the night!
“Take My Hand”
Do you ever hear a song and swear your S.O. wrote it for you because the lyrics are so accurate to your relationship?
This song falls into that category for me. Its storytelling lyrics and overall vibe are like the musical equivalent of my ideal relationship, one that is easy, honest, fun, and full of love. Lucky for me that’s exactly what I have, and I am so happy to be reminded of that when I listen to this song. I think holding someone’s hand is one of the purest symbols of love there is. It’s something I appreciate, will never get tired of, and can’t wait to be doing again.
I think I started and ended the week on pretty positive notes (pun absolutely intended), so I’m left feeling good about this first music share! Identifying my musical moments has helped me more clearly identify my feelings, and even made me more accepting of them. A win-win in my book.
Stand-Out Song of the Week: “Castle On The Hill”
I am so ready for an adventure. What songs do you listen to when you’re feeling that wanderlust kick in?
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© Copyright Whatismyhealth, March 12th, 2017